I don’t know if I agree with your view that significant internal growth isn’t going to impact external situations. I actually believe that how you think determines what you experience. It’s just that everyone doesn’t know themselves well enough to know what they really want deep inside. The conscious and subconscious may not be aligned.

I agree, I was referring to one potential case where someone else’s issues are not overcome by another’s personal growth. But in most cases personal growth would result in understanding that who you thought was annoying is not really all that bad. But as you pointed out in the analogy of the difficult boss, sometimes external change must follow that internal growth.

It sounds as if you’ve learnt a lot from your experiences. I look forward to hearing more of them, and of what you’ve learnt.

In terms of the “hypothetical tests” I described, I recognize that we always have choices. People can choose to see blessings in impermanance or, chose to be frustrated by what it represents in terms of a lack of control. Life phases could all be seen as offering opportunities to deal with change. I don’t know if I agree with your view that significant internal growth isn’t going to impact external situations. I actually believe that how you think determines what you experience. It’s just that everyone doesn’t know themselves well enough to know what they really want deep inside. The conscious and subconscious may not be aligned.

If you aim to improve your confidence and esteem, you may train for a marathon. If you don’t follow through with the training plan and don’t reach that goal, you can still potentially choose another pursuit where you can develop your confidence and esteem.

The same can be said in an analogy with an apparently difficult person. If you sense someone is out to make your life difficult, let’s say a boss, it may be in your mind. You can say it doesn’t bother you, and accept exploitation at least to the point where mistreatment causes you to change your mind. You may seek another job, to get away from this boss, yet constraints may exist. The boss may still exert control over you if you need a recommendation from him. I’ve known people to slander and sabotage staff efforts to leave. If you aim to put these sorts of things out of your mind, and this former boss still makes your life hard, you can leave the city or country or, find a way to tap into your subconscious to figure out how you could be attracting such treatment.

We all justify certain things at certain periods of our lives. To look back years later, we may wonder why we allowed ourselves to be intimidated or controlled, and why we felt so vulnerable. Any kind of perceived mistreatment often causes people to ask themselves what they may have done to deserve it or people who see themselves as victims may seek how they can lay blame. To me, relationships are perceived as smooth or difficult. Each is another opportunity to reflect on why we accept certain kinds of behavior, how we can evolve to rethink boundaries, limits, expectations, personalities and emotions.

For example, I reflect on a past work experience in a foreign country. At the time, I was so thrilled to convince someone to create a position for me, that I accepted mistreatment. I wasn’t eligible for a regular contract, and felt my conditions were better than nothing. When, after a period, I wasn’t paid based on an understanding, I was asked to leave, and to never to come back. It was a difficult time, but I rose above it. I learned survival skills, discovered self-respect and found better opportunities. Turned out my boss in the original scenario had serious psychiatric problems. She apparently said some terrible things about me, but she wasn’t “all there.” I had also been rather naive about my own expectations. I evolved not to blame her emotional moodiness and commital for my choices. The situation reminded me we can never predict everything. How we learn, react and send forgiveness matters.

Before and after the former situation, I have worked abroad where bosses did what they said they would do and didn’t do what they said what they were going to do. I’ve learned you can’t always trust people, but this isn’t reason not to trust anyone. People have their own issues, many of which you know little or nothing about. You live and learn to sharpen your perception and intuition.

Before anything else, I thought I’d remark about your uplifting image in Manchu Pichu. This is a place shrouded in mysteries. Personally, I sense my soul has been there before.

I’m very much looking forward to seeing it in person soon, perhaps next year

Your commentary makes many thought-provoking points. I like the idea that you prompt readers to question, “what kind of knowledge are we seeking?” If we knew that though, then why would we exert any effort at all?

For me it’s for the sake of that knowledge, and the benefit it provides, and the perception of reality it bestows. Knowing the answer doesn’t change that

I suspect that both the defeated physical challenge, and the continuing interpersonal challenge, are examples of the impermanent nature of reality. Perhaps if you thought that all would be fine once you completed each test as you expected to at the start, then yes, you misconstrued the test. Well, not the components of the tests, but the nature of the tests.

I think I agree with you about inaccurate perception. To me both seem to be tests concerned with dealing with change, either the lack of influence significant physical change may have on mental growth (i.e., you might feel low self-esteem and think that you need to improve physically, but that doesn’t end up improving your self-esteem), or the lack of influence significant internal change may have on external situations (i.e., some people enjoy harassing others and your attempts to make one stop harassing you might require more decisive action).

Your commentary makes many thought-provoking points. I like the idea that you prompt readers to question, “what kind of knowledge are we seeking?” If we knew that though, then why would we exert any effort at all? I reflect on particular physical fitness challenges which you might see as life tests. On the surface, you may think you’re stretching endurance, resilience, stamina or some physical abilities. Yet, if time passes and you deal with those tests, sense you pass them, but still feel unable to move on, then does that mean you misconstrued the true test? Was your perception deceiving you? How could you ever know in this lifetime? [Stories of near-death-experience (NDE) survivors describe life reviews which enable them to seee whether a mission was understood and acomplished]

In another example, consider you encounter an individual who appears to make your life very difficult. You may decide this is also a test. Rather than run from this problem, you may chose to face it in an effort to pass the test. You may decide you will use the opportunity to develop qualities such as resourcefulness, patience, inner strength, ingenuity, and see your own success in another sphere as being the best course of action. Yet, if this individual refuses to disappear and continues to make attempts to shake your focus, then could this mean you misconstrued the test? Are you more impatient than you initially realized? Obviously its another blessing in disguise and your perception simply needs to be stretched, right?

I’m glad that you’re more flexible these days, and I’m sure you still have some positive, beneficial convictions that you do hold onto!